So I just finished sitting through three and a half hours of The Grammy's and afterwards it made me wish I would have sat through Mob Wives, Desperate Housewives and a new episode of The Real Housewives of Atlenta instead.
My finger fucked the shit out of my fast-forward button whenever old boring crows such as Bruce Springstein, The Beach Boys, Taylor Swift, Snooze Fighters, Sir Paul McCartney, Glen Campbell and Coldplay took to the stage. Chris Brown lip-synched for his life during Turn Up The Music/Beautiful People and refused to sashay away. He did manage to sing an entire live vocal when he came out later to perform I Can Only Imagine with hip hop's favorite drag king, Lil Weezy. Speaking of Ike 2.0, his ex Rihanna gave us Tina Turner realness with her new blonde do and even managed to muster some choreography, which is the most she's done in six minutes at the Grammy's than she's done in her six-year career.
I wanted Skrillex to win Best New Artist since I'm all about the dance music but glad he won two Grammy's for Best Dance & Electronica Album and Best Dance Recording. I was also happy to see Deadmau5 turn it out alongside Foo Fighters who did the dance remix to their single Rope, and speaking of which I was glad to see one of my favorite rock producers Butch Vig win a Grammy with the Foo Fighters for Best Rock Album, since he produced their new album. His band Garbage also has a new album coming out this year which I'm really excited about.
Nicki Garbaj took to the stage to perform her new single Roman's Holiday, which made me want to go to the Hollywood Hotel, find Whitney Houston's stash of Xanax, take the entire bottle with some vodka and drown myself in my own bathtub. Even Lady Gaga had to look at Nicki and say WTF?
Besides the night being a big one for Adele, who cleaned up (you'd have to be a fool not to have predicted such an outcome and I was living for her Lady Bunny hair) and Bruno Mars giving us James Brown realness, the show was an overall bore. I'm just glad that someone who doesn't come with a gimmick, is a typical Hollywood beauty, doesn't show off her tits and use pyro and has 1,000 back-up dancers behind her showed everyone watching that at the end of the day, talent triumphs over all.
Check out all the Grammy winners below...
Album of the Year: “21″, Adele
Record of the Year: ”Rolling in the Deep,” Adele Adkins, Paul Epworth, Tom Elmhirst & Mark Rankin
Song of the Year: ”Rolling in the Deep,” Adele Adkins & Paul Epworth
Best New Artist: Bon Iver
Pop Solo Performance: ”Someone Like You,” Adele
Pop Performance by a Duo or Group: ”Body and Soul,” Tony Bennett & Amy Winehouse
Pop Vocal Album: ”21,” Adele
Alternative Album: ”Bon Iver,” Bon Iver
Rock Song: ”Walk,” Foo Fighters
Rock Album: ”Wasting Light,” Foo Fighters
Rock Performance: ”Walk,” Foo Fighters
Hard Rock/Metal Performance: ”White Limo,” Foo Fighters
R&B Album: ”F.A.M.E.,” Chris Brown
R&B Song: ”Fool For You,” Cee Lo Green, Melanie Hallim & Jack Splash
R&B Performance: ”Is This Love,” Corrine Bailey Rae
Traditional R&B Vocal Performance: ”Fool For You,” Cee Lo Green & Melanie Fiona
Rap Album: ”My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy,” Kanye West
Rap Performance: ”Otis,” Jay-Z and Kanye West
Rap Song: ”All of the Lights,” Jeff Bhasker, Stacy Ferguson, Malik Jones, Warren Trotter & Kanye West
Rap/Sung Collaboration: ”All of the Lights,” Kanye West, Rihanna, Kid Cudi & Fergie
Best Music Video/Short Form: ”Rolling in the Deep”, Adele
Dance Recording: ”Scary Monsters and Nice Sprites,” Skrillex
Dance/Electronica Album:“Scary Monsters and Nice Sprites,” Skrillex
Musical Theater Album:“The Book of Mormon,” Robert Lopez, Trey Parker & Matt Stone
World Music Album:“Tassili,” Tinariwen
Latin Pop Rock, Rock or Urban Album: ”Drama y Luz,” Mana
Tropical Latin Album: ”Last Mambo,” Cachao
Banda or Norteno Album: ”Los Tigres Del Norte and Friends,” Los Tigres Del Norte
Regional Mexican or Tejano Album: “Bicentenario,” Pepe Aguilar
Country Solo Performance: ”Mean,” Taylor Swift
Country Album: ”Own the Night,” Lady Antebellum
Country Performance by a Duo or Group: ”Barton Hollow,” The Civil Wars
Country Song: ”Mean,” Taylor Swift
Jazz Vocal Album: ”The Mosaic Project,” Terri Lyne Carrington & various artists
Jazz Instrumental Album:“Forever,” Corea, Clark & White
Improvised Jazz Solo:“500 Miles High,” Chick Corea
Large Ensemble Jazz Album: ”The Good Feeling,” Christian McBride Big Band
Blues Album: ”Revelator,” Tedeschi Trucks Band
Folk Album: ”Barton Hollow,” The Civil Wars
Pop Instrumental Album:“The Road From Memphis,” Booker T. Jones
Bluegrass Album: ”Paper Airplane,” Alison Krauss & Union Station
Americana Album: ”Ramble at the Ryman,” Levon Helm
Reggae Album: ”Revelation Pt. 1: The Root of Life,” Stephen Marley
New Age Album: ”What’s It All About,” Pat Metheny
Children’s Album: ”All About Bullies… Big and Small,” various artists
Producer of the Year, Non-Classical: Paul Epworth
Remixed Recording, Non-Classical: ”Cinema (Skrillex remix),” Sonny Moore
Gospel Song: ”Hello Fear,” Kirk Franklin
Gospel/Contemporary Christian Performance:“Jesus,” L’Andria Johnson
Gospel Album: ”Hello Fear,” Kirk Franklin
Choral Performance:“Light & Gold,” Eric Whitacre
Classical Contemporary Composition: ”Elmer Gantry,” Robert Aldridge & Herschel Garfein
Producer of the Year, Classical: Judith Sherman
Orchestral Performance: ”Brahms: Symphony No. 4,” Gustavo Dudamel
Opera Recording: ”Adams: Doctor Atomic,” Alan Gilbert, conductor
Spoken Word Album: ”If You Ask Me (And Of Course You Won’t),” Betty White
Comedy Album: ”Hilarious,” Louis C.K.
Compilation Soundtrack Album For Visual Media: ”Boardwalk Empire,” various artists
Score Soundtrack Album For Visual Media: ”The King’s Speech,” Alexandre Desplat
Song Written For Visual Media: ”I See the Light,” Alan Menken & Glenn Slater
Historical Album: ”Band on the Run (Paul McCartney Archive Collection – Deluxe Edition),” Paul McCartney
Instrumental Arrangement Accompanying Vocalists:“Who Can I Turn To (When Nobody Needs Me),” Jorge Calandrelli
Grammy Award Performances
Adele Performs Rolling In The Deep
Jennifer Hudson's Short But Sweet Tribute To Whitney Houston
Rihanna Performs We Found Love & Sings with Chris Martin of Coldplay
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