Well ladies and gentlemen, we can all breathe a sigh of relief and bring out our My Little Pony toys, because Elisabitch Hasselsnatch will continue to spread her vile outdated ideals on "The View." She denied the rumors that she's taking her royal donkiness to Fox News.
Her agent released this statement to UsWeekly yesterday: "While Elisabeth Hasselbeck has a great relationship with Fox News, there is absolutely no truth to the rumor that she is leaving The View. Elisabeth is passionate in her beliefs and enjoys being a part of this dynamic group of women and engaging in daily conversations."
Since SATAN himself cannot physically be a panelist on "The View," he uses his powers to channel his stupidity through Elisabitch. I've also said it millions of times before. The show won't be the same if Elisabeth wasn't there to say something that would make all the women on the panel want to smack her in the face with a 12 inch two-headed dildo.
P.S. Unfortunately, we all have to wait until Monday to see Joy and Whoopi rip Elizabitch a new asshole when they discuss the VP debate that was on last night. Because you all know Elizabitch had the BIGGEST orgasm and vagina leakage last night watching Sarah Palin spew all her ridiculous bullshit.
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