Just when you think you've heard it all, someone comes along with some new shit that'll make your no-no hole twitch violently. There's nothing wrong with no-no hole twitchings, but there's a time and place for that. this is not one of those times.
Anyways, this past Monday night, two cops in Indiana were trolling the hood when they noticed a naked dude in the window of his home. The window's blinds were not closed, so everyone could see the naked grampy and his shriveled vienna sausage. The two cops approached his door, which was wide open. They went inside and discovered something you'd find out of a fetish film. Or on X Tube.
Dude was on his sofa nailing himself in the ass with a claw hammer! The claw hammer was covered in a plastic bag and shoved up there. He couldn't just purchase some MAGNUMS? The cops also noticed some MOTOR OIL all over his genitals and nalgas. Okay, let's take a moment and think about this for a second. Now the police report didn't say which part of the claw hammer was up his ass, but I'm sure it was the handle part (I hope).
I mean, I'm all for sticking shit up your ass, whatever you gotta do to get off, but damn! some of you bitches go to extremes just to massage your prostate. My aunt and a friend of mine who are both nurses have told me of the stories of guys coming in the ER and the things thay've had to remove from their asses, and chile, if I sat here and blooged about them all, your insides would shoot right out of your ass! And you know how particular we gays are about keeping our backdoors sparkling clean and minty fresh.
Pepaw was arrested for felony public indecency. He asked for a second chance, but the cops denied him when they found out he had a previous conviction for public indecency.
The cops also interviewed a neighbor lady who said he's always naked in front of his window. She went on to say, "He does it 24/24. He's not right."
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